Ship Manifest, Princesz Irene,Grandfather Vincent Trezza's "Cruise Ship" !

http://www.china.org.cn/english/index.htm

http://www.china.org.cn/english/847.htm
(the above is a link to the "online confucious institute" which professes to teach one Chinese online.


hăi dĭ lāo zhēn
【 海 底 捞 针 】
Fish for a needle in the ocean; search for a pin in a haystack

Popular words & phrases:
wăng luò chōng làng
网 络 冲 浪
Surfing the net; net surfing
wăng shàng gòu wù
网 上 购 物
Online shopping
xu nǐ xiàn shí
虚 拟 现 实
Virtual reality

and most important, how to read the Chinese menu (or to paraphrase warren zevon, drinking a pina colada at Trader Vics,

I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand, Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain



liáng bàn qié ní
凉 拌 茄 泥
Mashed eggplant in sauce
táng cù lĭ yú
糖 醋 鲤 鱼
Carp in sweet and sour sauce
yú xiāng ròu sī
鱼 香 肉 丝
Fish-flavored shredded pork
qīng zhēng páng xiè
清 蒸 螃 蟹
Steamed crabs
má pó dòu fu
麻 婆 豆 腐
Stir-fired bean curd in spicy sauce
tiĕ băn niú liǔ
铁 板 牛 柳
Beef with ginger and scallions on a hot plate

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I think learning Chinese will be a huge challenge!
http://www.china.org.cn/e-learning/35/poetry.htm (web site with music, cool !)